Doing grown-up... 'oosh dear no'?

Idly chatting with Emma last night, she enquired as to whether I had stayed in touch with my most serious ex-flame Harmony. I said that I hadn't, and that I simply had no strong feelings of any kind towards her - it had been a relationship that went dramatically pear-shaped after we'd lived together for about 2.5 years - a long boring story. The last that I'd seen of the ex was when she landed unannounced at my previous address about 10 months ago (April '04). She was welcomed in by a rather puzzled Shane, and sat and chatted for about 45 minutes - she was close to completing her bachelors degree (as a mature student), but had been unwell - this was to lead to a hernia operation in the near future. At the time I wasn't backwards in sharing how surprised I was that she'd landed; she made some comment along the lines of 'Oh, I was passing, so I thought I'd call in and see how you are'. 'Okayyyyy' thought I - not entirely convinced. I wondered later if she was seeking some calming presence as the hernia was, I was told, stress-related. As it had been she who had ultimately brought down the axe on our relationship (though I may have placed the axe in her hand), perceiving her as having not moved on to a wholly happier, contenting and care-free existence did warm me - I'm not proud about that, but that's how I felt - easily relatable to self-esteem preservation. Anyway, as I said, the chat was profoundly civilised, if a little baffling and superficial. Anyway again, my point: initially, Emma seemed to think this was a little odd, however, she then suggested that had it not been for them having a shared child-interest (Alex), then she and Ed would be less likely to stay in touch. As it is, Emma and Ed are unambiguously connected for life. All of this made me wonder about whether it would be hugely grown-up to make casual 'how are you?' contact with Harmony. I decided that it would - it would be a mirror of her previous casual landing. So, rather than door-knocking - she now lives in CityToTheEast, I sent a short text stating: "Hello, long time no etc etc. Hope last year's hernia op ws ok & all now well wi u & yr's. Let me knw how things r. My new address - ... . Short note? Shane." The only thing that spooks me (having now sent the text) is that - as I had with her landing - will she imagine there to be some ulterior motive for my getting back in touch? The term 'oosh dear no' springs to mind.

I will share with you the outcome of this when there is an outcome to be shared.

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Chatting to Grandma Elspeth last night was agreeably pain-free - she was thrilled at the imminent televised football information that I shared. She abruptly ended the chat with "Anyway son, I've got to go - need to go do a whoopsy before the match starts". That's high-culture that is.