A most regrettable wall...
The townspeople of Barton are indoors. All by open fires. All curled up with a good book, f*** or soap opera for company. Bartonfolk have better things to be doing than to be answering silly questions. Thus:
Q: When is a wall not a wall?
A: When it's self being an arse.
Spent yesterday afternoon taking an 8-mile walk around a local reservoir - lungs met with clean air, cheeks with ruddy complexion. Bracing it was. Was with pal Catherine (unambiguously platonic single-mum-chum, occasional colleague, quite often smarter and more alert than is convenient). After our walk - an invigorating gad about the hills and trees of local Toriesville (I'm guessing - geo-political unfamiliarity of the new boy in town) - we returned to Catherine's house in Thornbury. A superb vegetablarian meal knocked up out of rotting whatnot and spicy doo-dah followed. The evening eveningised - as it often does - bellies bloated, heads-a-weary, brain mush on TV (Big Brother - I was unfamiliar with 4 of the cast of 8 - it was the celebrity version of the show). And then, out of "nowhere":
Catherine: "Before I ask this I want you to understand that I'm not interested in you"
Shane (quietly alarmed): "You mean you won't marry me?"
Catherine: "No I won't"
Shane: "In that case, (pause) I accept your refusal to marry me. Let us not be married in the summer of 2006"
Catherine: "Deal" (We shake hands)
(Momentary pause)
Shane: "What must you ask?"
Catherine: "Oh. Can I ask you a question about the one night stand that you had?"
Shane: "Where did this come from?"
Catherine: "Oh y' know, nowhere really, just thinking about my new skirts, and then that - it's something I wonder about sometimes"
Shane: "But why now?"
Catherine: "There's no reason to be so defensive"
Shane: "I don't talk about this kind of thing very often"
Catherine: "It doesn't matter. Forget it. It's not important"
Shane: "I don't mind answering it's just that I wondered where this came from"
Catherine: "No, really, it's ok"
At first, why couldn't I respond with a simple "ok", or most radically, "yes". Reasons include:- (i) I wanted to know if there was a judgement or revelation to follow, and with that, I wasn't convinced by Catherine's "I don't know" follow-up, (ii) my acquired (Nb/ not default) setting on such subjects is towards 'defensive' - sad but true, and (iii) I had no recollection of having ever referred to any one night stand - singular or otherwise - and what price inconsistency? We returned to undoubtably inconsequential chat. We later parted with the one-night stand line of conversation not satisfactorily concluded. I felt like an arse. Catherine seemed entirely at ease.
Meal out with Emma tomorrow evening. I will be dressed in 'relaxed' casuals - so relaxed that it only took a 40 minute consultation during yesterday's walk-and-talk to come to that decision. Hopefully, I will avoid the arse persona. Hopefully.
Q: When is a wall not a wall?
A: When it's self being an arse.
Spent yesterday afternoon taking an 8-mile walk around a local reservoir - lungs met with clean air, cheeks with ruddy complexion. Bracing it was. Was with pal Catherine (unambiguously platonic single-mum-chum, occasional colleague, quite often smarter and more alert than is convenient). After our walk - an invigorating gad about the hills and trees of local Toriesville (I'm guessing - geo-political unfamiliarity of the new boy in town) - we returned to Catherine's house in Thornbury. A superb vegetablarian meal knocked up out of rotting whatnot and spicy doo-dah followed. The evening eveningised - as it often does - bellies bloated, heads-a-weary, brain mush on TV (Big Brother - I was unfamiliar with 4 of the cast of 8 - it was the celebrity version of the show). And then, out of "nowhere":
Catherine: "Before I ask this I want you to understand that I'm not interested in you"
Shane (quietly alarmed): "You mean you won't marry me?"
Catherine: "No I won't"
Shane: "In that case, (pause) I accept your refusal to marry me. Let us not be married in the summer of 2006"
Catherine: "Deal" (We shake hands)
(Momentary pause)
Shane: "What must you ask?"
Catherine: "Oh. Can I ask you a question about the one night stand that you had?"
Shane: "Where did this come from?"
Catherine: "Oh y' know, nowhere really, just thinking about my new skirts, and then that - it's something I wonder about sometimes"
Shane: "But why now?"
Catherine: "There's no reason to be so defensive"
Shane: "I don't talk about this kind of thing very often"
Catherine: "It doesn't matter. Forget it. It's not important"
Shane: "I don't mind answering it's just that I wondered where this came from"
Catherine: "No, really, it's ok"
At first, why couldn't I respond with a simple "ok", or most radically, "yes". Reasons include:- (i) I wanted to know if there was a judgement or revelation to follow, and with that, I wasn't convinced by Catherine's "I don't know" follow-up, (ii) my acquired (Nb/ not default) setting on such subjects is towards 'defensive' - sad but true, and (iii) I had no recollection of having ever referred to any one night stand - singular or otherwise - and what price inconsistency? We returned to undoubtably inconsequential chat. We later parted with the one-night stand line of conversation not satisfactorily concluded. I felt like an arse. Catherine seemed entirely at ease.
Meal out with Emma tomorrow evening. I will be dressed in 'relaxed' casuals - so relaxed that it only took a 40 minute consultation during yesterday's walk-and-talk to come to that decision. Hopefully, I will avoid the arse persona. Hopefully.
posted by Shane @ 9:38 pm
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